next contestant … you lose



This post is from about 5hours ago.  I don’t even know how I got through – or out of – it except that I realize at this moment that I used some DBT skills I’ve been learning.  Sometimes I realize it’s almost a miracle that they even work …  When they do …  


Sometimes it seems life was so much easier when I just had depression and not all this other stuff too.  But then …  When was that, really?





been having a massive BPD moment for the last hour.   BPD hour I guess.    OMFG.   i can’t say i’m glad I don’t have any weapons,  but jesus christ the world is lucky that I don’t.


i just fucking lose it.   and I get lost in it.  and sometimes  i want to get lost in it.   i get SO FUCKING MAD and  i lose all trace of an appetite and i want to get the FUCK away from every single person on this earth   …   at least,  if i can’t eviscerate them  …  or blow dozens of bullet holes into their wretched,  vile,  and useless carcasses.


welcome to BPD hour,  with your host,  me.

next contestant … you lose

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